The Ties That Bind - Watch Them Unravel
by Lana Archer
Summary: There are words that build our worlds, then there are the words that destroy them. Which will Damon choose to use when speaking to two of the most important women in his life?
1. Chapter 1

**Note: **Don't ask me where this came from, but _do_ tell me what you think about it xoxox

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The Ties That Bind – Watch Them Unravel

* * *

Damon usually paid attention to things like these. He usually held his knack for obsessive-compulsiveness in high regard; but somehow this had fallen down the wayside. How could he have forgotten? How could _anyone_ have forgotten?

"Damon, what are you –" He stuck his hand over Bonnie's mouth, ignoring her frown and frail attempts at swatting him away.

"The deal was for you to be quiet remember?" He reminded her and she scowled but relented, crossing her arms to acquiesce, however stubbornly. "I just needed a second." She looked confused but said nothing as she watched him straighten his jacket unnecessarily. Nodding, more so to himself, he stepped away from the pillar where he and Bonnie had stood and made his way over to Elena. She and Jeremy had been catching up, the boy sprouting some mindless drivel about his classes when he wasn't looking over at Bonnie. Each time though, Damon would narrow his eyes or glare, he didn't have the time to consider why beyond his entertainment. When Elena caught wind of him Jeremy was all but forgotten as she turned to Damon, eyes lit, teeth glittering in the soft fairy-light framed reception area. She was beautiful, but so was Katherine…look what that had gotten him. Swallowing, he grinned at her and shooed Jeremy away, muttering about how Bonnie had nothing better to do for the moment anyway so he may as well go say hello. Grumbling Jeremy left and Elena wrapped her arms around his neck, looking like it was _her_ wedding day. "Dance with me?" Damon asked and without waiting for an answer, because he knew what it would be, he led her to the makeshift dance floor where a few couples were already twirling one another around happily.

* * *

Bonnie kept her eyes on Damon; something wasn't right. He'd half ripped her away from Caroline's arms, annoying the blonde who'd been in the middle of a lengthy apology for everything she'd done without her emotions. Then, he'd just kept her to his side, not saying anything, while he stared at Elena and her brother. She'd tried to tug on his suit jacket but he didn't respond, then she'd tried to talk and stuck his hand on her face, which, she was still pissy about. Then he'd grabbed her hand, given it a quick squeeze and sauntered off, like the entire exchange made sense.

"Bon, are you even listening?" Her eyes flickered to Jeremy's face and she smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry, I'm just –"

"Staring at…Damon?" Jeremy filled in with a confused expression as he smiled awkwardly.

"Not _staring_," Bonnie defended, "I'm worried about him." Jeremy's face scrunched up.

"Somehow that's so much worse." Jeremy said seriously and Bonnie sighed, took her eyes off of Damon and gave Jeremy a look. "You can't expect me to buy that you two are friends, can you?" Bonnie shrugged easily.

"Of course not, we're _best_ friends." Her smile was tight and bright and it unnerved the hunter boy somewhat. "So you were telling me about school?"

"I don't want to talk about school." Jeremy said with a slight edge to his tone. They both knew what he really wanted to talk about.

"Well," Bonnie shrugged, "I was just being polite anyway."

* * *

"Do you love me?" Damon asked as he looked down at Elena. She frowned a little and pursed her lips, wondering about his angle.

"Damon of course I do, _forever_, remember?" He nodded and pressed his mouth into a flat line.

"I thought so." Swallowing, he looked around as they moved and spotted Bonnie, she'd just turned to look up at Jeremy, he'd felt her gaze on him and without it he'd faltered somewhat but Elena's curiosity brought his attention back to her. "I want to try something with you, okay?"

"Okay." She was all smiles and happiness, it ate at him. He slowed them down and pulled her closer, this pleased her but it barely registered to him in that moment. Looking her directly in the eye he held her gaze and cleared his throat.

"I release you of this sire bond." He said evenly, sternly, as serious as he'd been all his life. He moved his head away then and watched the emotions play out on her face. First there was confusion, mounting to impatience before it slipped into understanding and then irritation before it dipped into a clear slate as his words took hold and then her eyes fluttered and her mouth opened and closed a few times. Damon stepped away from her as her hand flew to her throat, brows bunched as Damon's realisation sank in. She'd never loved him. Truthfully, he wasn't sure he'd ever loved her other. He'd projected Katherine onto her and then she'd sunk under the grips of his compulsion – they were doomed from the start. Hell, they were doomed the minute they sacrificed Stefan in the name of their 'love'. "Oh, God…" Was all that came out of his mouth.

* * *

Bonnie chanced a glance at Damon and Elena and her brows knitted together as she watched Elena gasp and Damon step away from her.

"Uh, excuse…uh, sorry." She stammered as she stepped around Jeremy and made for her best friend. "Damon?"

"It was a sire bond." Damon said softly and Bonnie blinked at him.

"What? Sire bond? Who?" She half squeaked, her eyes on Elena, who was waving her hands in front of her face, like she was having a mild panic attack.

"Stefan." The brunette gasped, ignoring Bonnie and Damon, "Where is Stefan?"

"With Caroline –" The words were barely out of Bonnie's mouth when Elena ran off. "Okay, enough." Bonnie said, turning her stern expression on him. "Start explaining."

* * *

"It was a sire bond." Damon explained, "She's never loved me." Bonnie felt the air whoosh out of her, pure shock filled her to the brim.

"…This whole time?" She whispered and he nodded, looking at his feet. "Damon, I'm so sorry."

"Don't be," Damon sighed, "There's no point." Bonnie scowled then and yanked on his elbow, pulling him away from the wedding reception and into a small clearing in the woods that framed the surrounding area.

"Damon, come on, talk to me." She said when he wouldn't even look at her. She took a step towards him and he tensed, but held his ground. "Hey, come on."

"Bonnie, _none_ of it was real." He said suddenly, heatedly as his fiery gaze finally met hers. "Everything I've known about love has been a lie since I was human… _How_ –" his exasperation cut his voice short and he looked like he might get sick. "I, I wasn't sure you know, when I said it, that's why I needed you there before I could, I don't know, build up the courage –"

"Damon –"

"– And then I said it and it all came slamming down on me, I never had Elena, like I never had Katherine, I thought that a hundred and forty years of waiting was too much to handle but this, Bonnie, I can't live with this."

"_Damon_…"

"And then, I mean, I remember you and Jeremy and **yes**, he was an _utter waste of space_ but at least he tried to love you and you tried to love him you know, there was a mutuality there, an understanding…a moment at the very least. But me? Everything I've ever experienced in my life has been draped in some sort of illusion, compulsion, a lie and I think it's all just occurred to me –"

"Damon, _listen to me_!" Bonnie yelled, "Stop!"

"_I can't, Bonnie_!" He cried out, eyes shaking as they scoured her face, "Look at me," he hissed, getting right in her face, "Look me in the eye and tell me I'm wrong." His skin was flushed and his nostrils were flared, she was sure his vampiric form was moments from surfacing, apparently she had that effect on him. He was always yelling about something lately.

"You're wrong." She said evenly, chin jutted out as she looked up at him. "Damon," she went on, lifting her brows, "You're _wrong_."

"…How?" His voice shook but it stayed hard, adamant, disappointed – _broken_. She looked flabbergasted before she ran her tongue over her bottom lip and tried again.

"Us." She said simply, and then started nodded, even as his face slipped into confusion, "I know you're wrong because of _us_." She smiled then, "Everything we went through Damon, it was _real_. We've been fighting death since the day we met and then we _did_ die and we still had to fight and I know that we hurt each other a lot in the beginning of all of it, but that's what makes what I'm about to say so important –" she closed more of the space between them, "What you and Stefan have? _That's love_. What you and Enzo _had_? That's love. What you and I have? **Love**, Damon, there's love here," she waved a hand between them, "_**Love**_. I'm sorry it's not the love you wanted but it's real and it's here." She swallowed. "I'm sorry about what happened with Katherine and I'm sorry about what happened with Elena…I am, but I can't let you think you're not loved and that you've never loved because you have…it's one of the reasons I'm standing here right now…you saved me because you love me. _That's real to me_." He looked down at the floor, at the leaves dusting the forest floor, littered with foliage and Bonnie's breaths. "…Well," she broke the silence, "Say something."

"You're right." He admitted eventually, nodding a little, and looked up, "But you're also wrong."

"…About?" She wondered. He shook his head, "Tell me."

"No, it would ruin the little I have left to myself and my need for it outweighs my selfishness."

"Love." She repeated, with a small grin.

"I _do_ love you." He said and listened to her heart flutter, "Since I got you back all I've wanted you to be is happy, whatever form that took and I guess that's the closest I've ever gotten to loving another person, I couldn't even do that for Stefan." His voice dropped and he looked ashamed. "And, now, I, I, don't even know where to begin, what to do, what to say –"

"Just breathe for now," she interrupted, taking his hand, "I'm here for you Damon, you know that."

"This just confirmed it Bonnie, I'm _not_ good enough, I _never_ have been." She sighed and squeezed his hand.

"Damon, I don't know what it means," she licked her lips and looked up at him through her lashes, "But you're good enough for me."

"**Don't**," he pulled away from her.

"No, you are." She insisted.

"All I do is take Bonnie, stop feeding into that –"

"I will love you however I _want_ Damon," she snapped, "You think that the answer to all this is pushing everyone away? It's not. You need me, you need Stefan, I don't care what you say…I can see how much it's hurting you Damon, but I _know_ in my heart that you need me."

"That's just _it_," He hissed, "I need you _too much_, I couldn't even do right by Elena without you next to me, I couldn't even think straight until I saw you in my kitchen with a plate of pancakes between us, anything good that happens to me Bonnie, I treat it like it won't ever suffice, and I refuse to do that to you because you're the best friend anyone could ever ask for….and somehow, you grew to love me and choose me to be your friend, _your_ best friend, and I'm terrified that I'm going to destroy that because right now, it's the most important thing in the world to me and I don't know if you've noticed but anything I hold dear to my heart is the first thing I ruin." Bonnie stepped towards him and he backed away.

"Damon, please don't do this." She said, her hands out in front of her, begging for compliance. "Please don't shut me out."

"I'm doing it because I love you."

"Then hate me," she countered, "Hate me and _stay_."

"I could never hate you," he said with a shake of his head, "_Never_."

"_Damon_…"

"And I can't live like this either, but I know you'd never forgive me if I just slipped my ring off and walked into the sun…so…"

"Damon, no…" Horror washed over her, "Damon, don't you _dare_."

"You'll bring me back," he smiled softly, "You knew exactly how to give me hope, how to bring me back from the edge every time…I just need it to stop, I need it to stop plaguing me…just for a while…"

"Damon, I swear to god! –" Her voice shook in terror, he couldn't…he **wouldn't** –

"Goodbye, Bon. I love you. Look After Stefan." She lurched forward at him, wanting to throttle him, but her arms wrapped around his neck instead. He held her closely, nuzzled into the crook of her shoulder and took a long breath, "Don't ever forget how much you mean to me."

"Don't do this, please." His breathing faltered.

"I'm sorry." He untangled himself from her and stepped away. "…I'm sorry I wasn't man enough to love you the way you deserve to be loved." She gaped at him. "Truly." She watched helplessly as he shut his eyes and took in a deep breath…when he opened them he broke her heart. Smirking at her and giving her a once over. "You're an idiot for believing in me, you know that right?" He snickered, circling her slowly, "And I'd love to stay and chat but I'm _starving_."

"Damon." The warning was clear in her voice and it brought a delighted grin to his face, but she saw through it, it's hollowness filling her insides with lead and sadness.

"_Yes, witchy_?" He sang as he dipped his head to dip his nose into the strands of her hair and take a long whiff.

"I love you too." She turned then, craning her neck to look him in the eye as a single tear left hers, "So I'll give you the time you need, but you're coming back to me, mark my words." Then, she stepped away from him and he watched her leave with a curious yet muted expression, unsure what she was trying to stir up in him.

"I wonder how much she'll love me when I raze this place to the ground." He chuckled to himself, speeding off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Note:** Uhm, you guys are kind of incredible.

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"_Damon, please don't do this." Bonnie said, her hands out in front of her, begging for compliance. "Please don't shut me out."_

"_I'm doing it because I love you." Damon replied._

**"_Then hate me," she countered vehemently, "hate me and _stay_."_**

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The Ties That Bind – Watch Them Unravel

When Bonnie walked away from Damon, she'd intended to go back to the wedding, find Caroline or Matt and get the hell away from everything. She kept hearing Damon's words run through her head, the utter anguish in every syllable uttered, the acute horror that shone in his eyes as he held her gaze. It hurt her more than the way he sneered at her, or the way he used to sneer at her. Knowing how he really felt, under it all, was what made her take pause, what made her feet fumble. A part of the feeling stemmed from jealousy – the luxury of turning it all off had always been somewhat cowardly to her, but after everything, everything with Damon and with Kai…she envied that ability now. She wanted a break too, but the odds of that happening were never in her favour.

"I'm doing it because I love you," she muttered to the trees angrily as she stomped her way back to the reception, "Who the hell does he think he is?" A shrill scream cut through the trees and caused her heart to triple in pace. Kicking off her heels she ran back to the reception area, prepared for the worst. But even she couldn't have expected this. Elena and Caroline were staring each other down, their eyes bleeding into a red-black, frightening the other guests who weren't as privy to the goings on of the supernatural world. How there were any of them left, Bonnie wondered, was a miracle in itself. Both vampires had their fangs bared and their hands splayed at their sides. The witch hurried over and came to stand between them while Jeremy and Matt ushered the guests away, muttering incoherent words of consolation. "Easy." Bonnie said, her hands out between the two of them, "I don't think this is the time or the place."

"On the contrary," Bonnie's eyes pressed closed for a long moment at the sound of his voice, "I think this is _exactly_ the time and place." Stefan's eyes darted from Bonnie's face to Damon's and back again, before returning to volleying between Caroline and Elena. Damon was standing a few feet away, nonchalant as ever. He crossed his arms as his smile widened, blue eyes glued to Bonnie. Stefan flashed to stand behind Bonnie, also positioning himself between the two vampires.

"What's with you?" Stefan asked and Damon's smiled twisted at the edges, so close to a full blown snarl. He laughed, the sound sending chills over everyone left at the reception.

"I think you have more important matters to discuss right now, brother." His blue eyes shone. "It seems that the fair Elena was never mine to begin with," he raised his hands, palms out, feigning surprise, "Lord knows no one saw that coming." Another bout of laughter. "And now I get to see her tear through her 'best friend' to get you back," he sucked air through his teeth and winced, "Just when you moved on, huh. How's that for timing?"

"Shut _up_, Damon!" Bonnie yelled. The elder Salvatore snickered and crossed his arms again.

"Did he…" Stefan's voice faded off at the end and Bonnie craned her neck to look up at him over her shoulder, her eyes were hard when she nodded her head. Stefan swallowed, his frown in full blossom as he nodded back once in understanding.

"Bonnie, I suggest you move out of the way." Caroline said, low and slow. Bonnie turned her head to curl a brow at her blonde friend.

"Or what Forbes?" The witch countered, "Let's hear it." Damon whistled in the background.

"Elena _always_ does this!" The blonde burst out, Stefan's eyes were keeping a steady gaze on both her and Elena. "She always acts like her feelings are the only ones that matter and I'm sick of it." Bonnie swallowed. She'd thought Caroline would have gone the usual route; the 'It's always Elena' or the 'Why not me?'. But this? Who could fight her on this?

"Doesn't mean you get to go on a _rampage_ at Alaric and Jo's wedding." Bonnie reasoned.

"She came at me!" Caroline snapped, "Shoving me out of the way and trying to kiss Stefan." Bonnie's eyes ballooned; well, that explained Stefan's silence.

"He was never yours!" Elena shouted, "Everyone _knows_," her eyes were dark and dangerous, "Stefan and I…we're meant to be."

"Then why did you _fuck his brother_?" Caroline shouted. Elena reeled back and flashed forward. Bonnie grunted in annoyance and sent a pulse of magic at the brunette vampire, sending her skidding across the floor – out cold. Turning, her face the picture of power, she sent another pulse of power at Caroline, who was still wild eyed and poised to run for Elena. The blonde spun backwards and landed with an 'oof' a good few metres in the other direction. Bonnie stood to her full height and turned to Stefan.

"You and Matt clean this up." She said, "Jeremy can help if he's up to it –"

"What are you going to do?" Bonnie turned to where Damon had been standing, unsurprised when he was no longer there. She drew in a breath and looked back up at Stefan.

"I'm going to get your brother back." She said determinedly. Stefan's mouth plopped open.

"Bonnie, you can't –"

"_Yes, I can_," she cut him off with a frown, "And I will."

* * *

How many leather jackets can one Damon Salvatore have? Bonnie asked herself as she rifled through his things in the boarding house. She needed something tied to him, or whatever's left of him at present. Sighing in frustration she stepped away from his closet and looked around her. She'd spent ages in this house; sure she didn't know every nook and cranny but she knew enough to be a little more creative than this. Closing her eyes she muttered a spell, drawing on the places where his energy was the strongest. One object in particular called to her immediately, and she frowned when she felt a part of herself tethered to the item as well. When she opened her eyes Ms Cuddles was floating in front of her, arm's length away. Frowning deeply she snatched the bear out of the magical hold and looked down at it, like the thing itself could explain to her why Damon's essence was tied to it so wholly.

"…Weird," she muttered, "_Definitely_ weird." More so because not once had she even inquired where the bear had been until now, she knew she'd sent it to him to deter Kai's plans of coming back to the present day – but…why would it be tied to Damon now? Perhaps in her death and through his possession of it…but even that was a stretch. Or was it? Holding the bear to her chest she closed her eyes again, muttering the spell, pushing through her distraction, but nothing pulsed stronger than the bear in her hands and she huffed in annoyance. "Have it your way, Damon." She muttered to his empty bedroom. Just then something occurred to her and she tightened her hold on the teddy, and shuddered when her magic sank back into her bones. A moan fell from her lips and she staggered a little but held her ground. Blinking through the dizzying fog shrouding her thoughts she felt nothing but Damon between the synthetic fibres of the toy and though it made no sense it was exactly what she needed to get her best friend back.

* * *

Doing a locator spell without actually harming the object of the person you're looking for required more effort than usual but Bonnie breezed through it. In fact, so much power was surging through her at present that the minute the spell took hold she saw through Damon's eyes for a brief moment. He was heading walking into the Grille. Dropping Ms Cuddles and grabbing her keys she high tailed it to the bar before he could do anything reckless.

* * *

When she stepped into the building he was leaning against the bar; eyes bright, chatting up some waitress. She shook her head at him but squared her shoulders and marched over.

"Uh, buh, buh." He tisked when she was within earshot, and after a flurry of movement he had the waitress by the throat, her back pressed into him, fangs at the ready. The poor girl didn't even scream. Bonnie looked around and everyone else continued as if nothing were amiss. Narrowed green eyes met wickedly glimmering blue ones and Bonnie raised her hands. "You say you love me," Damon went on, "But I know you better than you think."

"Doubtful." Bonnie muttered and his smile sharpened.

"You have this _need_," he said, the leather jacket squelching around his elbows as he tightened his hold on the girl, "To save people. People who don't even deserve to be saved so I _know_," his eyes flashed red and black for a moment, "The more people I kill," he chuckled as his one fang grazed the waitresses long neck, "The angrier you'll get," he ran his nose along the girl's neck and Bonnie's jaw tightened when she watched a single tear slip down the waitress' cheek, "The more you'll hurt me," he pouted thoughtfully, "The more you'll dislike me, hate me…" Bonnie frowned then. "The sooner you'll leave me alone."

"So you're doing all this because you think I can't walk away from you? That I can't stop caring about you?" Bonnie dropped her hands and chuckled softly, "You'd think with your emotions off you'd be able to see past your colossal ego." She rolled her eyes and ran a hand over her face with a long sigh before she looked at him again. "Kill her, then." Bonnie said. "Go on," her face was hard. "Drain her dry Damon and see what happens."

"I know exactly what happens." He snapped, "You give me an aneurysm." Bonnie made a loud noise, like a buzzer and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Wrong," the witch said with a loaded gaze, "You hurt her and I _**kill**_ you."

"_You wouldn't_." He sneered.

"No?" She quirked a brow, "The Damon I care about, the one I would never dream of hurting, the one who would never dream of hurting _me_ in _**any**_way…you made sure he left me… you're the reason I might _**never**_ see him again – why the hell would I be gentle with you?" She took a step forward then, "Why would I settle for _just_ an aneurysm?" She jerked forward, her magic wrapping around his skull like a vice. He dropped the girl with a loud shout and Bonnie waved a hand over the girl, moving her swiftly aside as the witch kept her eyes on the writhing vampire. "Why stop there?" She hummed angrily, "Hmm?" She fisted her left hand and his back arched, her right hand swung around and raised up, lifting him, twisting him. "How you thought you'd even get to _threaten_ me, or someone else's _life_ is beyond me Damon…you might feel nothing about it but I know you still remember us and **everything** that happened since we met." Her eyes glimmered with sparks of magic as she began snapping his bones, increasing the intensity of the aneurysm. "You don't get to test me, I don't care how much it hurts that the women you loved didn't love you back – you don't get to manhandle and disregard my love because it isn't _enough_ for you." She spat, watching as his body hung mid-air; his screams cut off with a tilt of her head. She made the power of the aneurysm ebb and flow so that he wouldn't pass out; she made sure he got caught in the brunt of the pain with no promise of relief.

The sounds of snapping bone still came, tearing sinew, torn flesh. She walked forward. "You wanted to turn it off, _fine_," she hissed, putting a hand against his side and transporting them to the woods. "You don't want to feel miserable about the choices you made? _Fine_. You don't wanna admit that you were wrong in any of this…_fine_!" His shouts returned, louder, like howls, "But don't **ever**, try and make me suffer because you're too much of a coward to face your reality." She flung him against a tree and released him of the aneurysm, but yanked him up and pinned him to a wide trunk with dense wall of magic that burned him each time he moved. "Don't ever treat me like I'm the naïve little witch you first met when you came here, because I'm not. You made sure of that, underestimating me, belittling me, hurting me, treating me like I was nothing more than a means to an end for you…and look at us Damon…look what you're doing to us now." She walked to him with a glare on her face, "Why are you doing this to yourself?" She wondered, her eyes searching his face, "To me? You knew I'd never give up on you so what? Why go through with it?" She shook her head and put a hand to his torso again and they reappeared at the mouth of the cave. "It's your choice Damon," she said when his wide, wild eyes met hers and caught onto what she was doing, "Come back or stay in here for good." She shook her head when he made to speak. "And before you say I 'wouldn't' ask yourself this, how long were you planning on staying like this? Years? The rest of my life?" She ducked her head and eyed him out as he tried to avoid her gaze, "Because that's how long you'll stay here if you don't man the hell up."

* * *

**Stay Excellent**


	3. Chapter 3

**Note: **Thank you, thank you, _thank you_ and enjoy XO

This was inspired by "The Fear" – Ben Howard

* * *

"_You don't get to test me, I don't care how much it hurts that the women you loved didn't love you back – you don't get to manhandle and disregard my love because it isn't _enough_ for you." Bonnie spat, watching as his body hung mid-air…_

* * *

The Ties That Bind – Watch Them Unravel

"_Oh my, my cold-hearted child, tell me how you feel"_

She tilted her head to the side impatiently when he said nothing and her frown twisted swiftly into another bout of rage and she used her magic to throw him inside.

"Bonnie, no!" He yelled as she squared her shoulders and lifted her hands to put a boundary up between them. No sooner was he on his feet and speeding towards her, was he flung backward again, repelled by her spell. She scowled at him.

"I know you, Damon." She said, her expression bitter with the fact, "You would have said anything to make sure I didn't go through with it." A groan of pain grew into a shout of incredulousness. He was upright and inches from her in a heartbeat.

"Let. Me. Out." He hissed, his voice low and snarling, she was indifferent as ever.

"No, this is what you wanted." She insisted. "You and I both know that this is how it would have gone," she went on, her arched brows daring him to say otherwise, knowing he would if she gave him a chance. She didn't. "You knew I would have done whatever it took to stop you and keep the town _and you_ safe. You knew that but you pushed me anyway."

"Predictable." He muttered angrily and she was shrugging, a smile blossoming on her face when a body sped past her, distracting them both. She turned, all business by the tension in her shoulders and Damon's senses were scouring their immediate surroundings at lightning speed and he was on high alert in an instant. "Bonnie, let me out. _Now_." He could taste the challenge in the air and he knew, not that he cared, but he **knew** whatever was outside was going to annihilate the little witch. "Bonnie, trust me when I say this, if you won't let me out, at least get in here, whoever it is won't follow you." She shushed him impatiently and he wanted to start screaming again; infuriated with this woman in front of him. She was _just_ out of reach and just when he was about to say something else his mother appeared in front of them.

"You said you'd never come back." Bonnie accused by way of greeting. Lily tilted her head and smiled an odd, cold smile as she regarded the witch; her blue eyes flitting fleetingly over Damon, amusement clear in her eyes.

"And you believed me." Lily said easily shrugging for effect. "What more is there on the matter?" Bonnie never turned to look at Damon. He didn't get a chance to see her face on more time before Lily sped forward and stuck her arm right through Bonnie, finally locking her eyes fully on Damon as his stomach bottomed out. "Now we're even." She smiled and yanked her limb free, curling her upper lip in distaste as Bonnie's body fell to a heap on the floor. Damon's breathing stopped. Time stopped. Everything came to a screeching halt. "You tried to derail my plans? Tried to keep me from my family? Put _her_," she jabbed a finger at Bonnie, "Above everything else and then lie not only to me but to the world about it? Kill Kai when you knew I needed him alive? This is what you get Damon," her eyes roamed up and around the cave mouth, "I hope you desiccate in here for centuries." She said as she looked back at him, "No one knows where you are, you get to watch her rot in front of you…" she hummed happily, "I couldn't have planned this better myself." Damon felt his knees give in as he fell to the floor, still, inches from Bonnie while Lily whooshed away, never to be seen again.

He couldn't take his eyes off of Bonnie. Her skin, the blood around her body; the patterns it made. How its sweet smell made his stomach curdle. He tried to reach for her again; his fingers slower this time as the blood around her began to congeal.

"_No_," his voice was gruff and watery, "Bonnie, no," he felt it all swirl inside of him and push its way through to the surface, his feelings overpowering him in that moment and bringing themselves back. For the dead girl in front of him who did nothing but try when it came to him, even when she had absolutely no reason to, she'd been there for him, trying to understand, trying to help, and trying to give him what he didn't even know he needed. "Bonnie?" He didn't know why it came out like a question? Her skin was bleeding of all its colour, her lips paling as well; he'd seen enough corpses to recognise one laid out before him. "No, no, no, no, no…."

* * *

"No!" Stefan roared, for what felt like the thousandth time in the last hour, "Neither of you are coming out of your cells until you both calm down and realise that this is only ending one way," he checked his phone again, growing more and more anxious when his text to Bonnie still hadn't gotten a response. "A conversation between the three of us as adults and not this endless screeching between the two of you." He turned on his heel after that and hurried up and out of the cellar. Dialling Bonnie's number he put the device to his ear and speed-paced up and down in the den, left and right, left and right as it rang. On the fourth ring the call connected and he slid to a stop, relief a moment from realisation. But all he heard was static and he moved the cell phone away from his ear to read the screen, frowning all the while when nothing was amiss and the call was still active. "Bonnie?" He tried but the static continued to grate at his ears so he eventually hung up; his concern mounting as he dialled Damon's number as well. The same thing happened and he decided that he should head out to the Grille because he knew Damon would be leering at something or someone there. It was a good a place as any to start and he grabbed his keys and made his way out, ignoring the girls screaming after him.

* * *

Damon was screaming. Heat reddening his face as he roared at the sight in front of him. When he drew in a breath the air got lodged in his throat and a force threw him backward, hard, onto the uneven earth. He couldn't make a sound because he still hadn't managed a breath. His body and twisted with a phantom panic as he struggled to get control over himself. His vision tore off and fluttered away, leaving him blind and writhing. But all he could think of was Bonnie; how dead she was and how it was all his fault. How it should be his fault. And how desperately he wanted the weight of it all to crush him so he could spend eternity trying to find wherever it is that she went. But the finality never reached him and before he could fathom his disappointment he opened his eyes up to the blank face of Bonnie Bennett.

He blinked up at her from where he sat, leaning against a tree trunk. _She was there_ and his ears quickly honed in on the sound of her calm and very present heartbeat. He was upright before he knew he wanted to be, looking down at her with disbelieving eyes. So he had died then. And this was the afterlife; her waiting for him? He could go with that…happily.

"Bonnie?" He loomed over her and her eyelashes fluttered quickly in response to the sound of his voice. "Am I dead?" She didn't seem to take in his question; her eyes roaming over his face in quiet curiosity. When she'd completed her inventory, her eyes returned to his cerulean gaze. She was reading him, taking him in, almost savouring him. "Are we dead?" He didn't say again, because that hadn't been dying, what they'd gone through. That had been an untimely reprieve from their awful lives, and he'd only realised that when it was too late. "Bonnie _say_ something."

"Damon we're not dead." Her voice was missing a warmth, an affection; though he knew he deserved much worse. "In fact, Lily was never even here." Now it was his turn to become still and unresponsive… "It was a simple spell, actually." He was sure if she wasn't trying to spare his feelings she would be grinning ear to ear at the success of her plan. "It was a little harsh, I know, but when I realised how long you planned on living like that, when I realised I had to live without my best friend…Well, I went a little crazy." A shocked laugh escaped him, soft as a breath as he tried to make sense of everything he' d just seen, everything he'd been made to feel as a result and he felt the anger, waiting to be called forward but something else, something softer yet equally persistent called to his attention.

"You tricked me." He muttered. She nodded and averted her eyes for a moment too long before she looked back up at him. "You made me think you were dead."

"You hurt me Damon." She countered, pointedly, "You made me feel so irrelevant and useless, _before_ you even turned it off." He frowned. "I know it hurts that they didn't love you, but guess what, I haven't fared much better myself, neither has Stefan…but you know what? You had us and you should have known that we'd stand by you no matter what. If not me, at least your brother." She drew in a tired breath and exhaled at length. "The whole point of loss is to mourn it and move on, how did you expect to do that by turning it off?"

"I don't know what I expected." He said softly. "It sure as hell wasn't you pulling a fast one on me."

"Well, truthfully, I didn't even know if it would work." She admitted and he lifted a brow, how could it not have worked? "I haven't known where we stood; where we _really_ stood with each other since we started growing closer…it sounds weird when I say it loud. But before, I knew two things; you couldn't stand me, and you cared about me more than you'd ever admit aloud. Then, when I got back everything changed and you and I grew closer than ever and that's when it all got …harder." She crossed her arms over her chest. "You got harder to read and I didn't know if you were pushing me away or pulling me closer."

"I was trying to figure things out," he defended.

"From what?"

"And a lot was happening then, with my mom and Kai." He went on and she glared at him. "I was trying to figure out why I wasn't happy even though I had everything I ever wanted." She nodded, urging him on, "I had Elena, you know, Stefan and I were okay, I had you, Kai was dead, my mom left town…things were looking up but I had this feeling and it kept growing and growing –" His voice had grown louder and angrier but he cut the sentence off and tried to reign it all in.

"The sire bond?" He nodded and drew in a breath.

"When I released her it all fell apart for me. Or in place, I don't know," he frowned, moving away from her, he needed to clear his head, make sense of everything. What was and what wasn't and what never would be. And if he was okay with any of it. "I realised that I've been lying to myself since the day I met Katherine and that…that took its toll on me."

"So you decided to turn it off." She surmised.

"That wasn't the only reason why," he said vaguely, as he looked off into the distance, through the trees, wondering if he couldn't just make a run for it and never have to have this conversation. But if anyone deserved the truth it was Bonnie. "It was more than that. It was how I treated Stefan because of it too, the thousands of things that I did…All the guilt just hit me too hard and … I thought it was going to kill me; I swear I felt myself seconds from just…imploding."

"We can work through it Damon –" She tried to close the space between them but it caused just to move further away.

"And that's the final thing," he said, "_You_." She gaped at him, an echo of the hurt he'd caused flashing in her eyes. "I won't pull you down with me." Her confusion set in, pushing past whatever she'd thought she was feeling before. "I love you too much."

"Okay Damon," she smile was livid and humourless as she waved a hand at him as she interrupted. "Either you love me _too much_ to hurt me like you say now, meaning I can't help you when you're hurting or you don't love me enough to keep your emotions on and _let me help you when you're hurting_." She threw her hands up. "Which one is it?"

"Too much," he muttered, "I love you too much."

"Either way I can't be your friend then?" She surmised, the hurt returning, "You made it clear that you didn't want me in your life when you decided to turn it all off and cut me out. So…I should take the hint right? I should just leave you alone?" He nodded.

"You should have just kept hating me." He said seriously and she sneered at him.

"Don't give me that." She snapped. "Stop bringing up our past like you do with everyone else," she glared at him, "Because _unlike_ everyone else our past is what made us better, it's what brought us together. No one had to forget anything for us to move past the shit we went through. We just _**did**_." Her chest was heaving she was so riled up. "That's what we do, Damon." She went on. "We hurt and we push through the pain together, whether it means we fight or hold each other together; we're always there for each other. No matter what."

"_Don't you get it?_" He burst and she fumbled a little. "That's just it!"

"What are you yelling about?" She demanded.

"Us!" He half screamed, arms flailing, "I'm yelling about _us_ because you don't get it."

"_What_?" She squeaked mad as hell when he was suddenly in her face, but she didn't move back. He wanted to climb onto her, fine, nothing she wasn't used to.

"I'm in LOVE with you!" He shouted, "And that fucking _terrifies_ me, because apparently I don't even know what that means. I don't know when it happened; I don't know what to do about it? I've hurt too many people and I've been hurt too much and I don't want you anywhere near me right now because there's an excellent chance I'm going to ruin you too and I'd never forgive myself."

She didn't say anything for the longest time and they just stood there, panting, wondering what the hell was supposed to happen in the wake of _that_.

"So," Bonnie's voice was barely a whisper as they stood chest to chest, "You love me but you don't want to. You don't want me to love you anymore but all I'll do is hurt you even more if I don't?" She blinked up at him. "What the hell am I supposed to do _now_?"

* * *

_**Thoughts? XO**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Note: **IIIIIIIIIT'S BAAAACK. Okay, enough yelling, but _hellooooo_ everyone! This story got some pretty stellar reviews, so I figured, hey, let's see who's still into it. (Inspired by '_Brutal_ _Hearts_' by Bedouin Soundclash ft. Coeur de Pirate)

* * *

"You love me, but you don't want to," Bonnie said, "You don't want me to love you any more but all I'll do is hurt you more if I don't?" What was a girl to do…

* * *

The Ties That Bind – Watch Them Unravel

_Are you the brutal heart that I've been looking for?_

It always came down to this between the two of them; this stalemate, this feeling of being on the precipice of something worth having. Something they owed to themselves. With her magic and with his past.

"You know," Bonnie spoke, pulling at his arm to get him to face her again as he was about to step away, "You're pretty brave for a coward."

"Not brave enough for you, I guess." He almost sighed. She shook her head but there was a smile on her face.

"What I meant is that so am I. I'll do whatever it takes for the people I love but when it comes to me I let it all fall by the wayside." He took pause and his eyes locked on her and Bonnie felt the shift, felt how this moment between them became etched into their expressions. This was new, different, terrifying. They'd never back down when it came to the other before this, but there was more than ego at stake, more than some supernatural mission or even their lives. This was about heart, hers and his.

"When you say you're in love with me," She went on, noting his wince, like he wasn't quite used to the truth being outside of him just yet," What do you mean?"

"I don't know," He admitted, "And that's what terrifies me, more for your sake than anything else."

"Does it feel like before?" Bonnie pressed, inching forward.

"Impossible," Damon said seriously, "Nothing about you makes me want to love like that anymore."

"Then don't." She whispered, her fingers circling his wrists, tugging him closer until they were chest to chest as she craned her neck to look up at him. Damon was sure his heart would have been pounding in his chest in this moment, had he still been human. But he wasn't human, hadn't been for close to two hundred years. So much had changed him since then, who the hell was he now?

"What about you?" He asked, not happy to have only his heart laid out in the open. "Do you…Are you in love with me too?"

"I've never let myself so much as consider it; you're my best friend, you'd been in love with my other best friend, but so much has changed and I feel like there's only one way I'll know."

"Name it."

"It's not a question." Before he could ask what it was she pressed her mouth to his softly, so carefully as if he were the fragile one between the two of them. Then again, maybe he was. Her hands trailed up his forearms with her nails skimming the surface of his skin until they came to rest, draped over his shoulders. Small kisses, pressed against his mouth before he decided to push back and take control.

Damon's hands found her middle and this time he had her pinned up against a tree, hiking her legs around his waist. And yet he was overwhelmed, incoherent and uncertain – all at once. Something he'd held onto for years, he'd finally let go, making room for something that had been growing in its midst. Something coming undone between the breaths that hissed through her teeth as her head fell back as he pressed his mouth to her neck. Damon knew a part of him wanted to power through that initial state of flux and just be in love again, but a larger part of him knew that, like anything else when it came to her, Bonnie took her time, made sure she knew what she was in for.

When his mouth found hers again the kiss had grown hurried, almost desperate, like a clock neither of them could see was counting down until it all ended again. Damon kissed her, pushed their bodies together, responded to her sighs with low growls of his own when his bottom lip caught between her teeth. There was no use trying to compare the feeling growing inside of him to anything he'd known before; the person he'd been then wouldn't have deserved this moment here; this chance, wouldn't have understood it for what it was – hell, the vampire he'd been would have laughed in the face of anything outside of the torture he'd known all his life purely for the sake of familiarity.

"I'm scared," he managed to breathe out against Bonnie's lips. He was scared that he'd do the same to her; make her the name and face of another miserable ache in his heart that he'd never move on from. Scared she'd love him back and die anyway. Scared that she'd change her mind before either of them even gave this a chance. He felt her fingers in his hair, felt her legs tighten around him as she brushed her nose over the tip of his with so much affection it ate at him. "I don't want myself to have this, but at the same time, it's all I want."

"Take it," Bonnie opened her eyes and held his steady gaze. "Stop getting in the way of your own heart. Just," her breath fanned across his skin, "Stop punishing the good things you have left because all you've let yourself hold onto are the bad ones." She was right; he'd held onto the bad but some good had stayed anyway. But he had no response for her, so instead, he ground into her and slipped his tongue into her mouth, hoping to whatever roamed the skies she could be a part of whatever was in store in his future.

* * *

Elena couldn't believe all the time she'd wasted without Stefan in her life. All the ways she'd hurt him; looked him in the eye and ruined every chance she had of ever being loved by him again. She hadn't really thought about Damon since she came to. She supposed in a way she'd flipped on him just as quickly as she had Stefan when she'd turned. But it didn't matter, it wouldn't matter until Stefan heard her out.

"You've pushed me away before this Elena," The vampire rolled her eyes as Caroline spoke up through the cell across from hers. "But this, this kind of makes me want to hate you."

"You've wanted to hate me for a long time Caroline, let's not pretend." There was a heavy pause.

"You know what? Okay," Elena heard shuffling as Caroline sat upright, "Let's stop pretending then. Let's stop pretending that you're the victim even when the situation has nothing to do with you. Let's stop pretending that it's okay what you've done to Stefan and now Damon. Let's stop pretending that the sire bond had nothing to do with your feelings for Damon before you even turned as if that has _nothing_ to do with the bond in the first place. Let's stop pretending you're worth dying for. Let's stop pretending that you're the only one who matters. Let's stop pretending you're the only who's lost anything throughout all of this. You're right Elena, we _should_ stop pretending. See how well you fare when people stop acting on this impulse to put you ahead of everything. I'm more than ready to stop pretending – are _you_?" There was silence and as Caroline moved to speak again there was a rush of wind and her cell door opened. She looked up at Stefan as she sat with her legs folded under her.

"Come on," he stuck out his arm to help her up. "Here's some blood." She nodded, unsure of what to say, if there was anything to say at this point. She watched as he unlocked Elena's door as well and handed her a blood bag too. The brunette tried to say something as she stepped closer to him. He pushed her back gently by the shoulder.

"Don't." He warned, his tone belying his impatience. "Bonnie's been missing for the last three hours, the last thing she said was that she was going after Damon."

"_What_?" Caroline yelped, "Where did she say she was going? Have you called? What about Damon –"

"Why would she go after him?" Elena wondered.

"Oh my god, who _cares_?" Caroline threw her hands up, handed the empty bag to Stefan, "I'm going to look for them. Come or don't, I don't actually care anymore." She sped away before either of them could respond. Elena looked down at her feet for a moment before she glanced up at Stefan.

"I think we should take this time to talk about –"

"Damon flipped his switch, Bonnie's missing. Whatever you have to say can wait. I'm going to look for them too."

* * *

Stefan found Caroline throwing branches around in an opening in the heart of the woods, sobbing. She'd already been to the Grille, and, after cleaning up after Damon, had figured the woods was the next logical place. But so far – _nothing_.

"Hey," he flashed over to her, surprising her, earning him a hard shove to the chest that sent him flying.

"_Stefan_!" she gasped, hurrying over to help him up as he winced, "Sorry, I didn't mean to."

"I know." Caroline looked away, trying to hide as she wiped her tears away. "We'll find her."

"We have to." Caroline began to walk ahead of him, ears straining to hear anything. "…Bonnie!" She yelled out suddenly, shoulders slumping more and more with each step. Another sniffle and Stefan found himself taking her hand. She pulled away. "I don't think that's a good idea," she said, looking ahead, "Considering all I can think about right now is how I'm probably going to have to kill your brother."

"That and the whole Elena thing, right?" Caroline frowned and stopped dead in her tracks as she turned to face him, full on.

"Look, a small part of me knew that I didn't stand a chance if she ever decided to give you a chance again," she lifted her brows, "and that was just as your friend. We all knew that it was Elena first." She sighed and crossed her arms, "But you changed, you found your way back to yourself and that's the person that I …got feelings for. Because he was brave and he had his priorities in check." She chewed her lip and shook her head slowly. "But right now, all I can think about is that Bonnie's in danger. Because she's putting Damon, someone she loves more than I ever thought possible ahead of her own well-being and I guess…I mean, it hurts because I'd do the same thing for her. I'd do the same thing for _you_ and I'm losing my mind because I don't know if she's safe with Damon and I don't know if I'm safe with you."

"Of course you are." He swore. Caroline couldn't tell if she believed him or not.

"Just… help me find my best friend." She said, eyes lining with tears, "Because she's all that matters right now." With a nod Stefan pressed his lips together and started walking again before he froze.

"This way," he hissed, catching her scent. "Come on."

* * *

"Damon," Bonnie moaned, breathless as she clung to him while he ran his lips and blunt teeth down the slope of her neck before pressing an open-mouthed kiss to her pulse.

"Damon, no!" Stefan snarled suddenly, flashing forward and tearing Damon from Bonnie while Caroline hurried to get to Bonnie and started doing an inspection, eyes wild, fangs bared. But, no blood.

"Get off of me!" Damon hissed, tugging free of Stefan who grabbed him again and looked him head on. "It's back on! Holy shit, it's _on_."

"Then what was…" Stefan drew in another breath, almost a cursory whiff and his eyes bulged. Caroline yelped an 'ohmygod' as she put two and two together.

"I'm just glad you're okay," Caroline was the first to react, hugging Bonnie close, "And I'm sorry about earlier, I mean, with the whole yelling at you thing." Bonnie squeezed back deciding to ignore her still flushed face and racing pulse.

"Thanks for coming for me." Bonnie said with a smile as they pulled apart.

"Duh," Caroline smiled, "Just don't make a habit of doing that again okay?"

"So what happened?" Stefan asked, lifting Damon up. "Last I saw you were set to stay that way for a while."

"Bonnie pretended to die." Damon said, smiling over at her as Caroline lifted her upright.

"Oldest trick in the book." The witch grinned.

"This is weird." Caroline muttered, glancing between them.

"Our _lives_ are weird." Bonnie agreed.

"We should get back to the house." Stefan spoke up, "I think we all need to sit down and have a drink."

"Yes. _Please_." Bonnie said, falling into step with him, "How much bourbon you got?"

"Just re-stocked." He beamed, lifting his brows when Damon rushed up behind her and threw her on his back, speeding off. Caroline and Stefan looked after them, half frowning, half smiling as the sound of Bonnie's giggles grew distant.

"Elena is _not_ going to be happy." Caroline noted. Stefan hummed softly in agreement before looking to her.

"But the real question is, are _we_?"

* * *

**A/N: **The next chapter is the last one. I don't know how people are going to feel about the way I handled the Stefan/Caroline/Elena thing, but let's be real, I'm not Elena's biggest fan but I also try my best to not demonise her for the sake of it so there are going to be talks coming up that try and work through everything that was in motion circa season six and how it translates into this story.

Thoughts?


End file.
